The Training Doctor’s Blog

Hello all,

What do I mean by this phrase “Remember if “you wait for others to do something…You might be waiting forever. Many times we feel committed or obligated to do something only after someone else has done their part of the task. Realize that even though people are good natured; if a substantial time length has passed; that their priority to do what they promised many not be as high as your expectation of having it accomplished.

Ex: You want to learn a new skill or exercise with a friend or partner; however after repeatedly asking your friend or partner when they are going to do it; you see that they keep promising you and the only thing they deliver is excuses.

Remember, you are your own person and the fact that you asked your friend or spouse to do an activity with you or take of a new hobby together is purely a nice thing to do but will sometimes not lead you to your goals.

If you want to do something and keep putting it off because you feel you will offend your friend or think that it won’t be the same if you do it without them; then get it over it, move on and do what you want to do.

Whether you want to: exercise, learn a new skill, make a grand accomplishment; if you are feeling that you can’t go on because you seem tied down or held back; then most likely you probably are.

What to do?

1) Make a statement to your friend or spouse saying like: When I first mentioned the idea of us starting an exercise program together; there was some interest, however everytime I ask you when we are going to start I am told not now, I have too many other things.

I respect that you have lots of things to do in your life and I have decided that I am going to start exercising 2-3 times a week. This way you have now set the stage you are not holding back on your life and that person; will feel a deep sigh of relief because they are not holding you back.

2) Hold to your ground and don’t let them try to make you wait any more; because it’s just going to get you more frustrated if they again keep their pattern up and don’t deliver on their promises.

Warmest, regards

The Training Doctor

“Helping People Turn Goals into Reality” (TM)

Tips for the Week : Gain control and decide when to Say yes or no?

1) Be sure to write all your personal commitments, and time for you down in your calendar, paper, blackberry, Act, outlook ,etc. and be sure to follow them with the same diligence and respect you would if it were a business contact

2) Respect: realize that you need to love and respect yourself before others will.

3) Give yourself Time to discover yourself and your many hidden talents

4) Be alert for

a) Tonality

b) Body Feelings: pay attention to caused your body is giving you when you feel you are about to lose control

tightening, stress, shaking ,etc

c) Notice the feelings of what it was like the last time you said “Yes” and should have said “NO”; did you have feelings of resentment, mad at the world or other not so good feelings

d) Be alert for Name calling and times when others don’t respect you to con you into or guit you into doing something you really don’t want to

Lesson for the week, that short term good feeling may not bee so good when the long term feeling is bad.

5) Role play

Exercise:

Tonight or whenever:

on a piece of paper write the following headings:

Last time I Said “Yes” when I should have said no

What did you say

How did it make you feel be specific

What would you have felt like if you said yes”

be sure to listen to this weeks podcast for more details about this….

Warmest, regards

The Training Doctor

“Helping People Turn Goals into Reality” (TM)

Hello everyone,

Does this ever happen to you; people ask you to do things but because of your good nature or respect for them you do things that you wish you would not have gotten roped into. We will be talking a lot about this over the next few pod casts; because sometimes; our mouth just opens and says yes before we even knew what we were doing. Then later on we say; oh how did I let that happen again, or its ok it won’t take me very long. But what you are doing is enabling the other person and they take advantage of your good nature. How to take back your control is what we will be talking about in this series of podcasts.

W hy do you want Control to choose to say Yes/No when that is what you want to say?

1) You will be less tired

2) You will have time for you to do the things that matter to you

3) You will get more respect; which will boost your self esteem

4) People will ask you to do things less and only ask you when they really need it

5) You will learn that you are probably doing other things on auto pilot that you really don’t have to be doing?

Warmest, regards

The Training Doctor

Through my many travels; I am often times asked and I quote “How do I relax” meaning them.

So, it takes me off guard for a moment but when I realize that these people are serious about this I am more then happy to answer their call.  Well Webster first off defines relaxation as a being in a re creative state or a condition when our muscles our totally at rest. Relaxation is also any time that you just enjoy your surroundings and or use as many senses as you have to be able to experience the world in peacefully and non-treating setting.  So, how do we become relaxed or get relaxed. Is there a process to become relaxed; yes there is, but many times this happens so naturally that its as easy as breathing, one breath in and one breath out and so on.

Many people will become relaxed when they choose to distance themselves from a stressful situation or problem.  Others in life don’t relax because they don’t know how and often times leads to serious damage that could have well been overcome if they took just a few minutes a day to practice the art of relaxation.  That’s right I said practice; why do you have to practice.  It makes sense to practice the piano, other skills or routine task so you can be more efficient at them.  But why do you need to practice relaxation.  Well question is what do you have to lose???? Nothing, just everything in the world to gain including better healthy, better relationships, more creatively and the lists goes on and on.

So, now that you understand and proably agree with me that relaxation is important; the reason we pracice it is so we can get to hightened states of awareness and peace in shorter amounts of time.  Thus one who is very good at relaxtion would actually be able to mediate and gain very similar effects a long sleep would have over body; leaving it fully rested and alert with a new perspective.

Througout this blog I am going to be talking about many ways you can relax from those that take just a few minues to others that you may choose to practice longer.  The whole thing is you need to make relaxation a habbit and part of daily or at least your weekly lifestyle.

Relaxation Exercise #:

1)  Pick a location where you can be alone and you won’t be disturbed from any phone calls or other interupptions

2)  Then either sit or lie back in a chair with your feet up and nice an comfortable

3)  Close your eyes

4) Count backwards very slowly frmo 99 -1 ,

5)  Notice the beat of your heart now

6)  I want you to imagine a vacation trip you took that you really enjoyed yourself

7)  And just imagine yourself there

Feel all the great emotions that you felt that day

9) Count backwards from 20-1

10)  After you feel comfortable and ready to get up, open your eyes and enjoy how peaceful you now are

This was just a simple one, but we will do much more on relaxation as this blog evloves.

Warmest, regards

The Training Doctor